THREE FOR THE ROAD

Well, ask and unfortunately, you shall recieve.

Just a few hours ago, in a post dedicated to Don Knotts and Darin McGaven, I wondered who the 3rd celeb to die would be.

As it turns out, Mr. Dennis "McCloud" Weaver, has also checked out. Not only did all three die on Friday, all three's first name began with a 'D'. Freaky, eh?

Not only was Weaver the star of McCloud and Gunsmoke, he also starred in Steven Speilberg's first ever movie - a little TV film called Duel.

Anyway, adios Don, adios Dennis, adios Darren.

By the way, in between the last post and this one, I had a beer. It was my first beer in about a week and just No. 14 on the year. I have to tell you, for the first time, I really, thoroughly enjoyed it. Usually, I drink beer just to drink, but this one - a Miller Lite - in a nice glass, was quite refreshing.

ADIOS, MR. LIMPETT

Beer count still at 13, but after this weekend's celebrity deaths, It could very well rise.

First Don Knotts goes out on Friday. While most folks in their 30s will remember his as Mr. Furley from Three's Company, I remember him from the film the "Incredible Mr. Limpett." It's a story where a dude becomes a fish. Don't remember anything else, but I remember that. Of course, Knotts will be remembered for his role as Barney Fife on the Andy Griffith show. Also, he starred in the greatest disney movie ever - Gus. It's a film about a field-goal kicking donkey.

As Barney, he was the original 40-year-old virgin, though I hear in real life old Donny boy was quite the stud. Three's Company was more likely a title of a show abuot life in his trailer.

Then, on Saturday, Darren McGaven checks out. Most remember him as the dad in an X-mas Story, but I remember him most as the dude on the Night Stalker show.
Funny thing I never watched that show, because the commercials themselves scared the hell out of me. By the way, if you've ever wondered what happened to Ralphie, that's him above Knotts. As you can, I haven't figured out hte photo deal yet.

Now, we all sit and wait for No. 3 to go out. I wonder who it will be.

If you get a second check out this website www.metallagher.com


Last thing. A new feature on FNC will be a mystery photo. Please tell me who this former child star is on the very top.

WORKING FOR THE WEEKEND

A few notes from the Presidents Holiday Weekend.

1. Beer count upped to 13 (read below for details).

2. I did get some news about a huge bump in the beer count. My buddy Steve won a ticket lottery and now has 4 ticks to Yanks-Red Sox at Fenway on May 24 (a wednesday). The big trouble is, it's a likely 5 p.m. start, which means I roll out of the ballpark around 8:30 in Beantown. Look for a double-digit intake that night.

3. My goal is now to not have another beer until St. Paddy's day, where there's little doubt, the beer count can double (from 13 t0 26).

4. I did realize Saturday night that people are generally stupid. My wife and I went to see Martina McBride at Radio City. Let me say, I'm not a country music cat, but she put on a great show and she's quite easy on the eyes. Anyway, they were selling about 8 oz. Martina Rita's at the show for $10 each. I saw hundreds about people drinking these things - at $10 a pop. I really wanted one, but refused because A: I wouldn't pay $10 for any drink unless it included a lap dance from McBride, 2: I wouldn't pay $10 for a drink where most of the money was going into Dolan's pockets and 3: I'm a cheap bastard, I mean, I generally refuse to pay overinflated prices at a concert (sorry, but $35 for a t-shirt that will last 2-3 trips to the washing machine, is a little too much).

5. NASCAR is a joke. Listen, I know millions of people are into it, but this rule that a race can end under a caution flag is a friggin joke. Imagine a baseball game where some dude on the bench for one of the teams gets hurt and they end the game right there. I can't imagine watching cars driving in circles for 3 hours only to have it end like that.

6. If the NHL allows its players to participate in the next Olympics, they need to impliment some sort of system where players can be disciplined for shit that goes on over there. Of course you know I'm whining about that hit on Jagr the other day. If Rutuu had done that in the NHL, he would be suspended at least 2-3 games. However, since he did it at the Olympics, nothing happened to the dude. So, if Todd Bertuzzi takes a stick to someone else's head, he could be suspsended for a few olympic games, but then skate right back into action when the NHL season resumes. Something's not right there.

7. Speaking of the Olympics, I'm red, white and blue as they come, but it dawned on me watching Team USA's game Sunday vs. Sweeden that I pretty much hate every dude on Team USA (except for Chelios, who I met once and was really cool.) Besides that, the rest of them are a-holes I always root against. Maybe if Leetch was there, I'd be more fired up.

8. With Ash Wednesday coming this week, I'm trying to think of something to give up. The problem is, all my vices (beer, soda, fast food, sweets) have already been given up. Maybe I'm cease ripping folks for a 40 days, but we'll see. If you have any suggestions, let me know.

That's all for now.

Love, Joe.

BREAKING NEWS

Beer count skyrockets to



13.

OK, so it's just one beer, but it's my first since Jan. 2. It was Miller Lite draft at ---- a movie theatre.

In wonderful downtown Dunellen, there's a movie theatre that has a bar attached to it. You can order pizza or whatever ever food they sell at the bar and they deliver it to your table - that's right, your table.

Me, the Mrs and kids went to see Curious George and that's where I had the taste.

If you have kids or just enjoy getting loaded at a kid's movie, this joint is for you.

Don't expect Dolby sound or anything like that, but at $6 a ticket ($4 for kids), it's worth it.

THey even have a deal where you get two tickets, a pizza and a pitcher of beer for $22.

Stay tuned for other beer count updates, but don't hold your breath.

WAYNE'S WHIRL

Beer count: Still at 12.

Some random thoughts from this week.

1. Who would've ever thought a member of the Flyers would be involved in illegal activities. Shocking.

2. People are ripping Wayne Gretzky saying "didn't he wonder where the $500,000 grand went." Well, I think he's spent most of the time wondering where how she went from this to this.

3. I was thinking about Wayne Gretzky on my way home last night. Think about this, his entire life, he's never - EVER - had to answer ONE question about his off-the-ice actions. NEVER. NEVER. And now, because some dopey ex-Flyer and his dopey wife want to bet $5,000 on a coin flip, he's getting badgered everyday. Women.

4. I won't get pumped up for the Rangers until everyone is home from Turin in one piece. Speaking of the Rangers, I don't care what Sid Crosby is doing or what Alex Ovechkin is doing, this Hank Lundqvist is the NHL rookie of the year, and quite possibly, the regular season MVP - though the honor could go to Jags.

5. Is there something wrong with Dick Vitale? His voice sounds shot and hoarse all the time. What's up there?

6. Gotta say I'm not too fired up for spring training this year. I have a bad, bad feeling about the Mets this year. I mean, a lot of people say they didn't get much better, but honestly, swapping Looper for Wagner is a big improvement right there. Plus you have Delgado at first instead of Doug "I suck" Mientkiewicz. Plus, Wright and Reyes can only get better (right?) and Beltran had to get better (right?) . Still, with a pitching staff looking older than Janet Jones, I have some serious concerns. THe only bright side is, the rest of the division, besides the Braves, suddenly sucks. The Marlins will blow, and the Phillies - well, they have Arthur Rhodes setting up for Tom Gordon. The Nats, they should be good, but they don't worry me. Really, the Mets worry me.

7. Might have a beer this weekend. The last time a major snowfall hit, me and my neighbors had a shovel/drinking party outside. So stay tuned. If I can make it through this weekend without a taste or two, I may be able to hold out until St. Patty's Day.

That's all for now. Enjoy the snow, and Happy Valentine's day to everyone.

THE TOILET BOWL

Before I start my rant on the Super Bowl, a big shout out to my brother mike, who won a Writers Guild Award Saturday night in Hollywood for a Simpsons episode he wrote. Not only that, he got to do schtick with Seth Green, who presented the award. Congrats Mike.







OK, everyone is weighing in on that awful Super Bowl Sunday. It was the first SB in a long time where neither team deserved to win. But mostly what I took from yesterday's game was:

1. Football sucks. OK, it's a great sport, don't get me wrong. I love it. But ... the rules of the game and the way it is officiated is awful. First the little stuff. Any sport that pretty much hinges on 50-year-old men spotting a ball where they think it should go from 40 yards across the field is just asking for trouble. Any sport that has 50-year-old men trying to keep up 25-year-old muscle heads is asking for trouble. At least in baseball, the fat umps don;t have to move that much. In NBA the court is small enough and in the NHL, the refs are amazing skaters and, for the most part, young enough to keep up with play.
Now, the big thing. I propose, and I hope Mr. Tagliabue is listening, that from this day foward, the ENTIRE ball has to cross the plain for a TD to count. Sort of like hockey, where the entire puck has to cross the goal line for a goal to count. That TD Big Ben scored yesterday might've been the softest TD in the history of football. Let me ask you this, if you are playing football with your friends and try to say that's a TD, they would kick the shit out of you. Imagine a game where dudes hammer each other all day long comes down to a pussy TD where - maybe 1 centimeter of the ball, scratched the goal line.

2. I hate Super Sunday. It's like the Kentucky Derby and shit like that. People that couldn't give a shit about football all year long come out in droves to watch this spectacle. Let's face it, it's a made-for-TV event not meant for football fans, but for the rest of america. Think about the Derby. Unless you go to Monmouth Park to drink tastes and smoke stogies, you don't give a shit about horse racing. But you watch the derby. At least that's only 2 minutes long and there's no breaking the plain crap.

3. The Stones should hang it up. Nuff said.

4. John Madden should hang it up. He really, really sucks. He brings nothing to the table. His schtick is older than Keith Richards.

5. Al Michaels is the most overrated play-by-play man ever. If I knew in 1980 what I know now, I would've rooted for Russia to roll over Team USA, so that cat could never do his "Do You Believe in Miracles" crap and make a career for himself. The dude is so pompous, so arrogant. He is everything that football shouldn't be about, but everything it is about now.

6. I'd rather have Mike Martz coach my team than Mike Holmgren. At least when Martz has troubles with clock management, it's not a shock and his players know what to do. Yestrerday, at the end of each half, Holmgren when into total vapor-lock mode and cost his team - at the very least - 6 points. Maybe Favre's not overrated afterall.

7. Did I mention the NFL sucks.

8. Did I mention I'm counting the days until the Rams sked comes out.

9. If I have to read one more story about the SB commercials, it's Hary Cary time (and I don't mean the former cub announcer).

10. Beer count still at 12.

FAVRE AND (HOPEFULLY) AWAY

Ok, I know this post will anger a certain fan of fishingnotcatching, but I have to get this off my chest. It's been brewing for a few years, and I finally have a forum, and, believe it or not, it's timely.

Much has been made this week on ESPN about an interview with a certain overrated QB, who says he may be leaning toward retirement. His name, of course, if Brett Favre.

This is about the 4th straight offseason where this cat has hemmed and hawed about retiring or not. Well, I have two statements/questions regarding this annual soap opera.

1. WHO REALLY CARES
Besides people who have nothing better to do than put cheese on their head and clog their arteries with bratwurst and cheddar 24/7, nobody gives a crap about this dude - expect Jersey girl - of course.
I mean, honestly, what makes this guy so special? OK, he won ONE Super Bowl (so has Trent Dilfer and Brad Johnson). He lost a Super Bowl his team had no right losing (so did Kurt Warner). He played 30 seconds after his dad died. He was in a Farrely brothers movie (so was Roger Clemens, Cam Neely and Ron Darling).
Besides that, what has he done? OK, he's put up some good passing numbers, but in reality, he's won ONE big game in his career. Let's not forget all the dogs he's put up. Remember the 6 INTs against the Rams in a playoff game. SIX. Remember the home playoff loss - at night - to Ron Mexico and crew. Basically, his dopey, hick act makes him lovable to the dopes in middle america who voted for 'W'. And that's it. This year, when he didn't have a championship team around him, he sh-t the bed all season.

2. PLEASE GO AWAY.
Honestly, Brett. If you actually decide to retire the NFL will go on without you. I mean, John Elway and Joe Montana - guys who have won more than 1 big game in their lives - have left, and I believe the NFL is still in business. The Packers will be OK. I mean, if they can go 5-11 with you, they can go 5-11 without you. And don't worry, the dopes in Northern Wisconsin will still go to Lambeau on Sunday even if you're home in Mississippi spitting tobaci. Please, for all of us, Brett, just go away. And please, PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE, don't go into the broadcast booth. Dandy Don's act was funny 30 years ago. It won't work now.

S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y

The one thing about having kids is going out with just the Mrs. on a weekend night becomes a once-every-two month sort of thing. You have to plan, line up sitters. The whole deal. It's easier to stay home.

Well, last Saturday me and Mrs. Pendleton did something we hadn't done in a year - clear your dirty minds - we went to the movies --- AND DINNER on the same night.

Actually, I believe it was the first time me and her saw a movie in a theatre in about 13 months. DVD players and kids do that.

Anyway, after this one night out, I realize I'm not missing a damn thing.

Ok, the movie - King Kong - was great. The key is we went to a 4:45 show (it's 3 hours) and then afterwards, wanted to get a bite to eat. This is when the total bullsh-t began.

I got a gift certificate for my birthday to Outback Steakhouse. We went there around 8:15, only to find out the wait was 1 hour and 15 minutes. Are you f-cking kidding me?

Then we shot down Route 1 and were gonna check out Houlihans in New Brunswick. When we pulled to the front of the place, the site of about 25 people sitting on benches and the floor in the lobby prompted us to visit downtown Hub City.

After paying $5 to park in the New Brunswick, we headed to a joint called Tumultys. It's a good place. Pub grub for the most part. Some overrated electric train on the ceiling. Well we were in there about 2 minutes (which, by the way, was 1 hour and 10 minutes less than the wait for a table). We actually were going to wait in the downstairs bar and up the beer count a bit, but halfway down the stairs, the cloud of smoke started forming. We told the cat at the desk we'd see him in 6 months when the Great NJ smoking ban goes into effect and walked out.

Taking a shot, we then walked to the Harvest Moon in N.B., only to be told the wait was 90 minutes. I mean, are they giving out blowjobs with every meal or something? So I said to the wife, fuck this trendy shit and we headed to this great Italian joint in Franklin Twp. called Cafe Primavera.

If you've never been there, get there. Food is excellent, prices pretty good and there's no trendy a-holes there. No B.S. Just good food. We didn't have to wait a second for a table, and about 15 minutes later our food was there. The best is, it's one of the those joints where you can bring in your own booze. However, since I wasn't planning on going there - I was however planning on raising the beer count - I was taste less, and therefore the count is stuck on 12.

Listen, I'm not totally against waiting for a table if it's a quality restaurant. But if anyone thinks I'm gonna wait an hour for a blooming onion or wait 90 minutes to have some dopey RU student - I know, that's redundant - screw up my order. Think again.

I know. I'm officially old. But if being young is dealing with that crap every saturday, I can't wait til I'm 50.

LET'S GO HOME, LET'S GO HOME

Beer count: Stuck on 12.


OK, here now are the 10 worst sporting events I've attended. A few things to remember when reading this list. This will be judged on my personal experience. Therefore, while the game might've been good, my experience may have been terrible. Also, in some of these cases, I've excluded pre and post game schtick. You will see as you go on.

HERE GOES

1. May 19, 1998 - The Sandcastle, Atlantic City, NJ. Some day I'll tell my grandkids I was at the first ever Somerset Patriots Game. And then I will tell them what a hellish night it was. First of all, the event itself is a step above beer-league softball. The dudes that have no shot of sniffing single-A ball. Add to that a stadium swarming with green flies and clueless newspaper big-wigs and it's a recipe for hell. How bad were the flies? In the radio pregame show, the announcers were urging fans to bring Skin-So-Soft with them to fight the flies. Thankfully, me and my cronies only stayed one inning and the Irish Pub of A.C. was only a five-minute ride away. Unquestionably, the worst sporting event - if you can call it that - I ever attended.

2. July 30, 1989 - Wrigley Field, Chicago. My friend Rich always told me never, NEVER, plan a vacation around the Mets. They will ruin your trip everytime. This was my first lesson. Me, my brother and a friend of his drove all the way to Chitown to see the Mets and Cubs battle for the NL East crown. It was a Friday day game at Wrigley. Sunny, about 85 degrees. Perfect. Mets score 5 in the third - thanks to a Hojo 3-run bomb - to take a 5-2 lead. But Dave Cone and Dick Aguilera meltdown in the 7th as the Cubs score 4 times - the big blow a 2-run homer from some dude named Smith to take a 6-5 lead. With the Old Styles now flowing, the Mets try to battle back in the 9th. With one out and Mitch Williams on the hill, the dog of all dogs Juan Samuel gets a one-out pinch hit single, setting the stage for Hojo. Hojo lofts a little blooper behind short and it's obvious to everyone in the park that Shawon Dunston will catch it. Obvious to everyone execpt Samuel, who gets doubled off first to end the game. A horrible start to an awful weekend. I thought I learned a valuable lesson that day, but still, whenever I go on vacation, I plan it around a Met road trip. I;ll never learn.

3. October, 1992 - I think this is the year, but I can't be sure. Anyway, me, my wife (who was my fiance at the time) and a mutual female friend go to see Jets vs. Colts at Giants Stadium. The problem is, it's pouring rain. POURING rain. There must have been about 20,000 people at the stadium. We stayed for most of it - a 6-3 Colts' win and then head back to my parents house for some piazza. Honestly, this may have been my only realistic shot ever to pull off a threesome, but like the Jets offense, it never materialized. If it had, this would no doubt be No. 1 on the best all-time list. Anyway, an awful day.

4. Sept, 2004 - Rutgers Stadium. Ok, let me go on record as saying the pre and postgame hijinks were tremendous. I must've had about 15 Rheingolds and a few Amstel Lights while wandering between my tailgate and my friend steve's tailgate. But once inside RU stadium, the day took an awful turn. First of all, drinking tons of beer on an empty stomach and then walking into a packed stadium on a 95-degree, sunny day is not a good mix. What would've helped would've been a nice bottle of water. Of course, Rutgers was totally unprepared for any crowd over 20,000 and ran out of water before the first quarter ended. Needing some refreshment, I settled for a bottle of lemonade. Well, let me tell you - throwing cold lemonade into a stomach filled with nothing but Rheingold and some chips is a bad move. Let's just say after feeling like my stomach was going to explode - and me actually wishing it would - i spent most of the game testing Rutgers' plumbing system. Worst yet, after the game, I had to hear all the RU fans saying they were going to a bowl game because they beat Michigan State. Again, pre and post game was tremendous. But my experience at the game makes it a bad one.

5. October, 199ish - Jets vs. Chiefs at Giants Stadium. Nothing ruins a fun day at the stadium like seeing a dude get paralyzed. Yes, I was the Dennis Byrd game. No explanation needed.

6. July, 1984 - For the first time in my life the Mets are actually in the NL East race. They had beaten the Cubs on a Friday night at Shea to take a 1/2-game lead in the East, and then on Saturday, Doug Sisk blew a game, setting the stage for a Banner Day Double Dip at Shea. Of course, the Mets get swept and the season is pretty much over. Shitty day.
As you can tell, I'm running out of steam here.

7. March 30, 2004 - Knicks vs. Blazers at Garden. Let me preface this by saying I hate the NBA. Every player is an a-hole, the game itself is a fucking bore and did I mention every player in the league is an A-hole? Anyway, I had to be at work in the city real early the next day (like 5 a.m. early) so my company hooked me up with a hotel room across the street from the Garden and some Knicks tix. Let's say, I've never had a bigger non-drinking enduced headache at a sporting event like I had at this game. If it wasn't the loud music blaring during timeouts and during actual gameplay (another reason I hate the NBA), I had some dame screaming in my ear the entire tilt. I couldn't wait for the game to end, unfortunately I was at an NBA game, and they take forever to end. MISERABLE.

8. October, 2000 - The Big Shea. Once again, worked hooked me up with some Mets playoff tickets. It was Game 3 of the NLCS againt the Cards. In case you've forgotten, the Mets took the first two at Busch and were primed for a sweep. So me and my neighbor get into the city around 1:30 for a 4 p.m. first pitch and start eating and drinking - on his company's dime - at ESPN zone. We hop on the 7 train around 3 and roll into Shea just in time to see the Mets totally mail one in. I think the Cards got 4 runs in the first and after Mike (Padre) Piazza kills a first-inning rally with a tailor-made DP, the Cards get a few more. Me and my neighbor were back in Times Square - eating and drinking for free again - by the 7th inning. Of course, to rub it in, the Mets roll the next two games and reach the Series.

9. Sept. 1, 2000 - Texas A&M at Notre Dame - If there's on sports combo I can't stand it's football and heat. Honestly. I could watch a grid tilt in -20 temps and never complain. However, I can't stand watching football in any weather hotter than 80 degrees. I mean, I could watch a baseball tilt in 100-degree temps and have fun, but for some reason, to me, football and heat don't mix. So obviously a jam-packed Notre Dame Stadium and 100-degree heat was not a good mix. Add to that some yahoo sitting in front of us yapping about how great the Texas A&M band is and you get the picture. How hot was it? Me and the three guys I went with sat in the interior of the stadium for most of the third quarter. The only highlight was my friend Joe snapping a picture of Jerry Faust (whom, for some reason, is still loved in South Bend).

10. October 20, 2004 - Beaver Stadium. The final score, I believe was Iowa 6, Penn State 4. Yes, a total of 8 points scored. In addtion to brutally boring football, I didn't even get to sit with the guys I went to the game with. Now, this is a case where pre and postgame schtick has been excluded, because the before and after was tremendous. But, based on game only, this was a horror show.

So that's a glimpse into my miserable sports existence. For those of you included in this list, it's nothing personal.

Beer count: Stuck on 12

Well, it's been a week since I was at the world's most overrated arena for Mark Messier night, and I have to say I'm still pumped up over it. It got me thinking about where it ranks among other sporting events I have attended. So, for my first list of 2006, here are my top 10 sporting events.

1. January 30, 2000 - Super Bowl XXIV Rams 23, Titans 16: What a thrill to see the Rams, the team that has killed me my entire life win the Super Bowl in person. Of course, they couldn't make it easy on me, killing me until the very last second, but it was well worth it. I do have to say, the city of Atlanta is a joke. How they ever got the Olympics there is beyond me, but it's a day I'll never forget.

2. April 2, 1985 - Mets opening day. Ah, the 80's, when public drunkeness at baseball games not only wasn't frowned upon, it was encouraged. A chilly day at Shea in which Harry M. Stevens made about $80 in beer money off me ends with Gary Carter, in his Met debut, homering in the bottom of the ninth to beat Neal Allen and the Cards. It was the first real sign a championship at Shea wasn't too far away. Another day I'll never forget.

3. April, 1997 - The last ever Hartford Whaler game. As a big supporter of the Whale, this was quite a sad day. However, I will always remember it since my wife and I won the "Whaler ticket upgrade" contest. It's pretty much where some schill for the team picks out two people in the nosebleeds and gives them two great seats. Well, I won it that day, and we even got on the video screen walking from the upper level to the lower lever. So, remember, if you ever get on Jeopardy or Who Wants to be a Millionaire, and the question is "Who was the last person ever to win a ticket upgrade at a Hartford Whalers game?" you will now know the answer.

4. Dec. 6, 1988 - It's rare that an NFL regular season game would make it this high, but this game is historic on several fronts. First, it was my initial Jet tilt with the Professor and Pops. Two, it was the game that set the stage for instant replay in the NFL. In case you have forgotten, it was the Jets-Seahawks tilt in which Vinny Testaverde, on a fourth and goal with teh game on the line, tried a QB sneak, but came up about 4 yards short. The refs, however, after discussing it for a few minutes, gave him a touchdown, helping the Jets to a division title and Dennis Erickson to the unemployment line. What's sad is, after having about 20 beers and sittting 3 rows from the top of Giants Stadium, I could see Testaverde didn't score. Anyway, the day ended with me - now 5 hours after the game - not being able to drive home and my wife coming to pick me up at a Dunkin Donuts in Old Bridge. In that Dunkin Donuts parking lot she told me she was preggers with our first kid. What a day.

5. Sept. 1995 - Cal Ripken ties Lou Gehrig's record. OK, I couldn't get tickets for the record breaker, but this was good enough. Me and my friend Steve got out picture taken with Johnny Unitas, and I got to see Joan Jett walk on the field after the game. It was a pretty hard core night.

6. August 11, 2005 - Round 1 of the PGA Championship at Baltusrol. It was hot, real hot. Not a great day to be drinking. But hey, who cares. Anyway, on the second tee, me and Steve were about 2 feet from Tiger Woods when he teed off. I never heard a ball make a sound like that. The highlight, however, came after he teed off on the third hole and we got to see Eldrick go into a port-o-john.

7. Nov. 2, 1997 - I think the year is right. Anyway, me, steve and two others attended the Chicago Bulls home opener. Ok, you say, no big deal. However, we had seats on the floor right behind one basket. At halftime, I talked movies with the late, great Gene Siskel. DUring the game we got Dennis ROdman to wave at us and we also got to see Jordan up close in his home field. Even better, we had been the Penn State at Northwestern that day, and had Redskins-Bears and Penguins-Blackhawks on tap for the next day. My only regret is I didn't get to call Ahmad Rashad Bobby Moore to his face.

8. March, 2004 - Ok. State vs. St. Joe's regional final at Meadowlands. Let me say this right off the bat, the Meadowlands Arena is an awful place as far as atmosphere is concerned. Sure, every seat is a good one, but the place is dead most of the time. Not this day. A great game from start to finish, ending with Jameer Nelson's 3 falling just short. Probably the best hoop game I've ever seen.

9. Sept 14, 2002 - Nebraska at Penn State football. A night game in Happy Valley is hard to beat, especially when you play golf at 9 a.m., get hit on by some chick working at the snack bar at the golf course, start drinking at noon, and then trip the light fantastic after the titl. Game was great, too. I've gone on record as saying that it's the loudest I've ever heard any stadium when PSU scored a defensive TD in the second half. Of course, I was 3 sheets to the wind by then, so maybe I was just hearing things. As it turned out, Nebraska was lousy that year and a win over them wasn't really a big deal, but for one night, it was a great game.

10. Aug. 20, 1993 - Mets at Phillies. You won't see this one on ESPN classic, but I remember it because it was the night of my bachelor party. Basically, 30-plus cats loaded into a bus filled with beer and cheese sandwiches in Woodbridge, NJ and headed to the Vet. Needless to say, mayhem ensued. All I remember about the game is it was Bobby Jones' big league debut and Tim Bogar hit an inside the park HR for the Metsies. Plus, one dude in our party got lost and after waiting in the Vet parking lot for him for about 3 hours, we left without him. Anyway, it was great time. Probably deserves to be higher than 10, but that's it.

Coming next week. The bottom 10. Stay tuned.

WHALE OF A WEEKEND

Beer count: Stuck on 12.

Still no beer since Jan. 2. The scary thing is I don't miss it. Real scary. Although, if I have to watch another weekend of this bullshit product called the NFL, the vodka count will skyrocket.

Ok, the Colt-Steeler game was great, but why? Because NFL refs have their heads up their arses. Not only the Palumala INT being overturned, but the no-call on the offsides/illegal motion play on 4th-and-1 late in the game. ARE YOU KIDDDING ME?

And then, in the Bears-Cats game, they award the Bears Dude a TD when he cleary went out of bounds at the 3 and fumbled out of the end zone. I can't wait for the refs to screw up big time in a Super Bowl and finally people will realize what a flawed product the NFL and football in general is. I mean, I hate the Patriots, but that INT call against them Saturday night was completely bogus. It cost them 7 points.

As for football in general, most of the game depends on where 50-year-old men standing 20 yards away spot the ball where they think they saw the runner go with it.

However, as long as there is beer and gambling in this country, the NFL will continue to be huge.

One final thought: If the Steelers don't win Sunday, there will be absolutely no juice for the Super Bowl. Denver vs. Seattle? ZZZZZZZZZZ. Denver vs. Carolina? Snooze fest.

Lost in the all this NFL talk is the amazing play of the Hartford Whalers/Carolina Hurricanes. This team just refuses to lose. Ask the Flyers. Anyway, I'm already planning my trip to Carolina for the Stanley Cup Parade. By the way, nice job by the Islanders letting Pete Laviolette go.

Anyway, that's all for now.
I'll adress Mark Messier night, Howard Stern and Joe Pa's "She was hot, he should've raped her" comment in a day or two.

HITCH YOUR WAGON

BEER COUNT: Stuck on 12.

Yes, I made it through an NFL playoff weekend without one beer. Hard to believe. If I were a Giant fan, the number would be about 40, but it's stuck on 12.

Some random thoughts.

1. The Giants suck. I'm sooooooooooooooooo happy they were exposed as frauds on Sunday. I'm even happier, Tiki was exposed as a bigger fraud. What a wonderful end to an overrated season.

2. I read that Dr. James Andrews had a heart attack. Does this mean pro athletes with elbow woes are sunk?

3. My condolences to the family of Ram great Jack Snow, who died Monday of a staph infection. What a friggin way to go.

4. One of the best TV shows - THE SHEILD - has its season premier tonight. If you have never seen it, check it out, it rocks. 10 p.m. FX.

5. 24 season premier just five days away

6. Mark Messier night just two days away

That's all for now.

WELCOME TO 2006

Well, it's 2006 and although the year is only 3 days old, I wonder what's the over/under for wishing someone Happy New Year.

Honestly, if you see a friend for the first time on Jan. 10, do you say Happy New Year? Just wondering. Anyway, with a new year here, I'm gonna make a few predictions for 2006. Here goes.

1. I will lose weight. I say this every year, but I actually mean it this time. Me and my brothers are having a competition to see who can lose the most weight. There's cash involved. I'm actually motivated.

2. I will buy a bike. I haven't had one in about 20 years. I'm gonna buy one and actually ride. I wonder if the term "it's just like riding a bike" actually applies to riding a bike.

3. I will be mean to anyone who watches reality TV. And this includes my wife and kids. They watch it all, as for me, the only Surivor I'll support are the dudes who sang "High on You." I hate reality TV. Of course, if Fox starts looking for contestants for Blogging with the Stars, I may have to change my tune.

4. I will get sucked in by the Mets. I'm sure sometime around mid-July, they will be leading the NL East. I will start thinking about playoff baseball back at Shea and they will break my heart. I know it's coming, I just can't stop it.

5. I will really get sucked in by the Rangers. They will reach the Eastern Confernce Finals and will be up 3-2 on Ottawa, and then it will all fall apart. I'll never learn.

6. I'll drink plenty of beers. As a matter of fact, I plan on counting the exact number of beers I'll have this year. I will start every post with beer counter. As of 3:49 p.m. on Jan 3, the count is at 12. I had 7 on Sunday and 5 Monday. No plans for any more this week. Check back after Saturday for an update. So at this pace, I'll have 1,460 beers this year.

I'm gonna set the over/under at 620 (that's 12 a week). Considering I'm at 12 3 days in, the over looks pretty good. However, there will be - believe it or not - weeks where I go without drinking at all. Of course, there will be days where I can bang down about two week's worth. For those of you dumb enough to even think about taking the under, a tip, I don't drink anything but beer. Since I'm now 40, I've considered going the wine route or even rum or crap like that. But you know what, screw that stuff. It's beer, beer and only beer.

7. I'll lose count by mid-February. I got loaded Friday night and couldn't even guess how many beers. I had. Of course, I could lose interest, too.

8. I'll go to the movies this year. With the invention of kids, DVD players and $13 tickets, getting to the movies isn't a real priority. However, I'm sure I'll get there once or twice.

9. The only three non-sports related TV shows I'll watch all year will be 24, Medium and Without a Trace. Everything else sucks. These three kick total arse.

10. I will provide more interesting posts than this one. It's not a good way to start the year, but I promise I'll rebound.

Happy New Year (hope it's not too late).

THE 10 DAYS OF PENDLETON

Well, it's been a while. But when you read the next post, you'll know why. At this time of year, everyone starts ranking Top 10 movies, records, people, events of the year. Well, here are my Top 10 days of 2005. You'll notice most of them involve heavy drinking, which is no coincidence.

So here goes, my top 10 days of 2005 (in chronological order)

1. January 2 -- I originally was gonna list Jan 1 - the day I had a neighborhood NYD party at my house, but the next day - when me, my dad and my brother went to a sports bar to watch some NFL action - tops it. Since I work Sundays, I rarerly get to watch entire football games, and I hardly ever watch them with my dad and brother. So it was nice to get out and do it. Plus the Rams beat the Jets that day to back into the playoffs. Not a bad start to the year.

2. March 19 - My friend Steve had a sizeable St. Patty's day party at his house, and I have to say, it's a great day. My kids get to run around unsupervised, my wife can chat with other dames and I can get loaded, play golf and watch the Big Dance in relative peace. Best thing about this party, is he provided plenty of high-class tastes (Harp, Guiness). It's a good day.

3. April 20. I can't remember the exact date, but it was around this time the Allen Oldies Band rolled into Hoboken, NJ. I'm sure you've never heard of this act, but it was the greatest live show I've even seen (including Springsteen). These dudes played for 5 hours with no breaks. They drank Rheingold, rubbed peanut butter in their hair and played great oldies all night.

4. July 9 - Not many men would list the date of child's birthday party as a top 10 day, but this one was. The dude across the street from me has a nice inground pool and it was his son's 5th birthday. Me, the Mrs. and the kids walked across the street around noon and I stumbled back across the street sometime around 1 a.m. In between was some fun with the kids, a pretty good magician, a huge storm that chased away all of the non-entities and plenty of 12 oz. cocktails. I did swear - since I was having my 5-year-old daughter bringing me beers out of the cooler - the next day I would quit drinking. The boycott actually lasted until ...

5. July 26 - If I had to rank them 1-10, this would be in the top 3. Every year, me, my neighbor and another friend drive up to North Jersey for an all-day wiffle ball tourney. Basically, my friend's cousin has built a wiffle field of dreams in his backyard. So it's hours of drinking, wiffle and good eating. It's a tremendous time.

6. August 16 -- Me and the family went to L.A. for a week to visit my brother, who writes for the Simpons. We visited him a work one day and got to see the cast do a table read - which is where the sit around a table and read the script for the first time. We also got to meet Joe Montegna, who was there doing a guest spot. I also saw the dude who played Howard Stern's father in Private Parts walking around the parking lot.

7. Sept 5 - Labor Day in South Plainfield NJ is a huge day. There's a parade, fireworks, the whole nine yards. Well anyway, it was kind of a repeat of July 9 without hte magician. It ended with me drinking beer and talking to a nun watching fireworks in the Church Parking lot.

8. Sept 17 - Any dad dreams of the day he will coach is son or daughter in youth sports. Well, Sept 17 was my coaching debut of my daughter's soccer team. We lost, but I didn't care.

9. Oct 1 - Took my daughter to her first Mets game. Enough said.

10. Nov. 5 - My friend who has the St. Patty's Day, also has season tickets to Penn State. Well, every year I usually go to one game with him and this year was no exception. The day involves a huge tailgate with plenty of great food (yet too many high-class tastes), a great game (PSU beat Wisconsin) and - surprise, surprise, plenty of drinking. The night usually wraps up in the Shandygaffe - a dive bar on the great campus of Penn State. The next day is always usually a tough one, but it's also a top 3 day.

PREDICTIONS FOR 2006
1. Jan 12 - I think I'm gonna get a ticket to Mark Messier night at the Garden.
2. March 4 - I think I'm gonna get a ticket to Carolina at Duke hoops. St. Pat's Day guy might be in, too.
3. Sept 9 - Penn State at Notre Dame.
4. Wiffle ball day
5. Valentine's Day (HEY NOW)

Ok, that's it. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and Happy New Year to you and yours.

BLOW IT UP REAL GOOD

Perhaps the greatest thing about owning a home is - in my opinion - getting to decorate it during the holidays.

I mean, think about it, in this day in age, if you want to paint a rock in your front yard, you have to get a permit from your town, but when it comes to Christmas decorations, you can pretty much do whatever the hell you want.

That being said, too many liberties have been taken in this department, the biggest culprit is this new wave of inflatable decorations.

I have to say, a few years ago, they were cute. You had a Rudolph one, a Santa one, a Homer Simpson. That was fine. Now you have snow globes that acutally snow. I'm waiting to see the inflatable Baby Jesus on someone's lawn soon.

I myself, hate the inflatables for two reasons.
1. They look like sh-t when not inflated. Listen, I have enough ugly looking mounds of crap on my front yard without me having to pay $49.99 to put another one out there.
2. This new wave of inflatables have, for some reason, made the classic light up plastic decorations obsolete. I mean, go into any store these days and try to find a plastic snowman, or santa, or wooden soldier. They are nowhere to be found. What the f-ck is that? I mean, the white-trash looking icicles are bad enough. But no more plastic snowman. Unf-ckingreal.

So, if you are driving around central jersey, and see a house with no icicles, no inflatable crap and 4 - count em - 4 plastic snowmen on the yard. That's my hut.

The only inflatable I'll be investing is something to keep me company on a cold winter night. (HEY NOW). Or this one.

By the way, Jerseygirl. Check this one out.

FOOTING THE BILL

Yesterday afternoon is was having a few drinks with a neighbor - in preparation for my wife's 20th HS reunion - and I nearly killed myself falling down the stairs. While I survived the fall, my left foot took quite a beating.

I think I sprained it or something. It's possible I broke a little bone in there, but we'll see.

Anway, while raking leaves today in serious pain, it dawned on me how underrated the foot is.

Seriously. Think about it. Without the foot, or feet we'd have
- No football
- No shoes
- No running
- No walking
- No playing footsies
- No dancing
- No ice skating (hence, no hockey)

That's just the tip of the iceberg.




So next time - especially this time of the year where we're giving thanks for stuff - give thanks for two healthy feet.

THERE'S ALWAYS TOMORROW

With the holidays right around the corner, it's time to give a viewers guide for most of the holiday specials you'll be asked by the major networks and cable outfits the watch this time of the year. With so many to choose from, I'll help you clear it up the best I can. So here goes

ONES TO WATCH

RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER: Unquestionably the greatest TV holiday special of all time. Not only is it funny, it also shows a side of Santa we don't see in any other show - his A-hole side. Throughout this entire show Santa is a huge douche. Two seconds after Rudy is born, the cat's ripping him for the red nose. When Rudy is embarrassed at takeoff practice, Santa is there to not only blast him, but also his old man for letting it happen. And when Rudy's parents and Clarice are missing Santa tells Rudolph he's worried about them because he needs Donner to pull his sleigh. This shows was a selfish dude St. Nick really is. Even at the end, he's only nice to Rudolph because he needs him. Also, how is it possible Santa doesn't know about the Island of Misfit Toys. He knows if some 6-year-old in Indonesia is nice or naughty, but doesn't know about this land of free toys just minutes from his house.
The show is also fun to watch to try and spot the gay undertones between Yukon and Hermie.
Another fun way to watch it is take a swig of beer everytime they say Santa. Yule be bombed before 8:30.

HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS: No, not the lame Jim Carrey flick. I'm talking about the original that's narrated by Boris Karloff. It's a tremendous show, and very funny. It also - if you think about it - pretty much reveals there is no Santa, because if there was, he'd be there to stop the grinch. The songs are great, animation is great. It's a can't miss.

THE SIMPSONS (TIS THE 15th SEASON). The X-mas episode where Homer finds Santa's Little Helper gets most of the X-mas pub, but this episode, which aired in 2003, is much better. It's an ode to every other Christmas special and it's friggin hilarious. The California Raisins doing their own nativity scene is worth the price of admission right there.

MR. MAGOO'S A CHRISTMAS CAROL: The last can't miss on the list. Awesome translations of Dickens' work. Magoo is up to his visually-challenged schtick and the songs are tremendous. Just ask yourself this question, how many other shows have someone singing about Razelberry dressing?

THE YULE LOG: It's now on MSG and you have to admit watching a log burn on TV for 12 hours is much more interesting than a Knicks game. It wouldn't be Christmas without this show.

HOME ALONE: I know I'll get ripped for this, but you just don't see any more movies where a little kick lights up Joe Pesci with a blowtorch. It's my holiday guilty pleasure.

ONES YOU SHOULD SEE
OK, these next few you can take em or leave em.

IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE: Great flick, I admit, and the fact that NBC only shows it once a year is a nice move. But, really, it's kind of like an NBA tilt, just turn it on for the last 20 minutes and your good. The second Clarence arrives it when it gets going. It is worth tuning in early on to see Alfalfa from the Little Rascals open up the pool, but then you can tune it out until the last segment.

A CHARLIE BROWN CHRISTMAS: Outraged that it's not on the must-see list? Well, let me ask you this. How many years have you seen that CB is coming on, you get all pumped up for it and then 6 minutes in you're reaching for the remote? It has it's moments, but really, it's quite boring. I'm the only one with guts enough to say it. So there you go.

YEAR WITHOUT A SANTA CLAUS: Like It's a Wonderful Life, all you have to watch is the 10-minute span with the Heat and Snow Misers. Besides that, the show is quite, quite lame.

SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN: What amazes me is the folks who own the rights to this show took so long to start cashing in. I mean, Rudolph stuff has been available for years, and only know do you see stuff from this show - like the BurgerMeisterMeisterBurger dolls - in Toys R Us and stuff. Still, it's a pretty good show (Put one Foot in Front of the Other) is worth the hour you invest in it. But a must-see every year? No way.

A CHRISTMAS STORY: The 24-hour TBS marathon every year is a bit much. But it's either that or Lakers-Heat on ABC. Again, it's a good movie, but it's one where you can tune it in for about 3 minutes, get a laugh or two and move on.

ONES YOU CAN AND SHOULD SKIP

THE POLAR EXPRESS: I saw this in the movies with my kid last year and I have to say it scared the hell out of her. It's really freaky, especially when it shows some homeless dude who lives on top of the train. The animation itself is very freaky. Avoid it all costs.

FROSTY THE SNOW MAN: There, I said it. This show sucks. And besides, the magician is right. They stole his hat, he should have it back. F--- Frosty.

NATIONAL LAMPOONS CHRISTMAS VACATION: Randy Quaid in the little dickey is funny, but this flick get more tired each year.

RUDOLPH'S SHINY NEW YEAR: Can you say, piece of sh-t.?

Now, I know there are much, much more, and I'm sure I forgot about a bunch, like George Goebel's Classic "The Night B4 Christmas" with the mouse living in the clock. BUt these are the ones I really only care about.

Merry Christmas everyone.

You might want to check out this link to some real bombs

http://www.nationallampoon.com/nl/08_features/xmasspecials/xmasspecials.asp

S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y

Hey, I'm back. I know it's been a while, but I'm sure nobody missed me.
Anyway, since this blog has turned into a Top 10 list, I'm gonna hit you with one more.
Last week, I rented Season 1 of Pee Wee's Playhouse on DVD for my kids. I have to say they loved it, and I have to say, it still made me crack up. So, while raking 8,000 leaves on Saturday, I started thinking about what were my favorite Saturday Morning Shows back in the day.
Also, when I think back to those times, I always remember that on the Friday night before the shows all made their debuts in September, there would be a show previewing them. Pretty hard core stuff.
The only criteria is they had to be on network TV (CBS, NBC or ABC) and they had to be on Saturday mornings. Also, some cartoon staples like Underdog and Scooby Doo have been left off. They are all-time classics, not just Saturday morning shows. There here are basically shows that were only seen on Saturday mornings.
See, here goes, the top 10 top Saturday Morning Shows of all time.

1. Pee Wee's Playhouse (CBS) - How great was this show? I used to wake up -- even while severly hung over -- in college on Saturday mornings just to watch it. If you remember watching it, go out and rent the DVD and you will laugh your arse off. If you've never seen it, rent it and look for young stars such as Lawrence Fishburne and Phil Hartman in the show. The dame from the original Law & Order is also on there. Great show.

2. Hong Kong Phooey (ABC). Man, I loved this show. Scatman Crothers was great as the title role and they had some hot cop dame running around too. In case you forgot, the cat's name was Spike.

3. The Hudson Brothers (CBS). These dancing and singing brothers were dubbed "The Kings of Saturday Morning" by their friend John Lennon. I believe one of them even knocked up Goldie Hawn and produced the lovely Kate Hudson. Anway, they did lots of goofy schtick, but it was good stuff. You don't get TV like this anymore.

4. Big John, Little John (NBC). After his run as Oliver on the Brady Bunch, Robby Rist returned in a Saturday monring sitcom where the great actor Herb Adelman would - everyonce in a while - turn into a 12-year-old kid. The theme song was very catchy. Hard to believe networks produced sitcoms just for Saturday morning, but they did.

5. Shazam (CBS). Two great things about this show. The title charcater was played by the David Cassidy wannabe who blew off Marcia on the Brady Bunch episode where she works in Mr. Haskell's ice cream shop. Also, it's the only TV show in history where a superhero rides around in a winnebago. But that's what it was and it made for great schtick and action.

6. Superfriends (ABC). All the superheroes in joint, and Ted Knight doing the narration. I have to say while I loved the show, I hated the friggin super twins.

7. Pink Panther (NBC). The cat never said a damn word, but boy was he funny.
(As you can tell, I'm running out of steam).

8. The Odd-Ball Couple. It was cartoon version of the Odd Couple, but it featured a cat (Spiffy) and a dog (Fleabag).

9. Fat Albert. I know, it's low on the list, but that's because I don't like Bill Cosby.

10. Far-Out Space Nuts. Bob Denver and Chuck McCann as dudes lost in space. What else could you want with your Cap N Crunch.

OK. There are some obvious omissions like Land of the Lost, and H.R. Puffenstuff and Sigmund and the Sea-Monsters. Well, you know what, I didn't like those shows, what can I tell you? As for the Smurfs. F--- them.

BRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCE

While driving to work today, I was listening to the SIRIUS Springsteen station, and since I'm in the mood of listing songs, I decided to list some bruce tunes.

There will be 2 categories of 10 songs each: The 10 best, the ten worst.

I'm taking into consideration most of his tunes. I don't have Devils and Dust, so that's out. Any rarities will also likely be out. Also, I'm trying to mix it up. Obviously, almost every track on Born to Run could be in the top 10, but I won't do that.

I'm sure I'll be ripped for some of my picks, but that's how it goes.

THE 10 BEST

1. Born to Run. An obvious pick, I know, but this tune is what he's always been about (overcoming all sorts of crap, chicks, cars & Jersey).

2. Rosalita (Come out Tonight). A classic. Not much else to say.

3. Thunder Road. Crank this baby up while your driving down the Garden State Parkway. Nothing beats it.

4. Streets of Philadelphia. Tremendous song. Really captures the desperation Tom Hanks portrays in the film.

5. Prove it All Night. To me, it's his best tune on Darkness. Great intro. Great guitar/sax solos.

6. Sherry Darling. Bruce as his partying best. Also shows off his sense of humor.

7. Lost in the Flood. The sleeper of the group. It's intense, it's hard core. It's early Bruce in a nutshell.

8. Point Blank. An amazing song. Haunting piano is great. Also, I messed around with a dame in college while this played on a continuous loop. That could be affecting my decision.

9. Santa Claus is Coming to Town. I know I'll get ripped for this choice, but let's face it, it's a Bruce classic.

10. Atlantic City. Bruce sings about another boardwalk in Jersey for once with awesome results.

OK. Now it could get nasty
THE 10 WORST

1. Mary Queen of Arkansas. Hard to believe the same dude that wrote the above 10 banged this one out.

2. The Angel. Hard to believe he put 1 & 2 on the same album and it's still a great disc.

3. The Big Muddy. Perhaps his best B&B song (bathroom and beer) during a concert.

4. American Skin. The cops werent' walking out of his concerts because they were pissed about the song, it's because the song blows.

5. Dancing in the Dark. A pop piece of crap with weak keyboard riff.

6. Man's Job. SOng is bad enough, but the backup singing at the end is the final insult on this waste of vinyl.

7. My Hometown. What a sappy piece of junk.

8. Merry Christmas Baby. Imagine seeing Bruce in concert, Clarence comes out in the Santa suit and he plays this instead of Santa Coming to Town. Can you say REFUND.

9. I wanna marry you. OK Bruce, you wanna marry her. How many times do you have to say it?

10. Secret Garden. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

That's it for now. Rip away. I can take it.

UNDER THE COVERS

I posted a list of some of the worst cover songs a few weeks ago, and promised my list of best cover songs. So here goes.

A few things to remember: I'm only including songs that were somewhat hits or generally popular. So if I leave out some obscure cover by someone, that's why.
Also, to me, what makes a great cover is changing the song a bit. If you do just a straight up ripoff of the original, that doesn't count in my book. Also, if the original was kind of obscure, that doesn't count either. Aretha Franklin's Respect is actually a cover of an Otis Redding tune, but not many have actually heard that one.
Finally, this is just a list off the top of my head. No real research has gone into this. Feel free to rip me if you wish

1. All Along the Watchtower by Jimi Hendrix. Dylan wrote it and recorded it first - a bluesy, harmonica renedition. Hendrix took it and made it into a rock classic. To me, this is the greatest cover since Hendrix took an already great song, changed it, and made a tremendous record.

2. Heard it Through the Grapevine by Marvin Gaye - The underrated Gladys Knight banged it out a year before Marvin's soulful version was released. Sadly, when people hear this song now, they think about the stupid dancing raisins. However, a great version of a great song.

3. Higher Ground - RHCP. Little Stevie Wonder banged out a soulful version first, ad the Chilis turned into a funk-rock classic years later.

4. Always Something There to Remind Me by Naked Eyes. I have to say I really enjoy this version. It's a classic 80s' tune and it still holds up today. This song, originally penned by Burt Bacharac - has been covered by millions of people, but the Naked Eyes version, with it's techno intro and catchy bass line is the best.

5. Baby One More Time by Fountains of Wayne. OK, their video didn't feature them running around in skimpy school-girl outfits like Ms. Spears, but there version of Brittany's first hit is pretty cool. I actually makes you realize what a good song it is.

Again, these are just off the top of my head.

Again, feel free to rip.